Category: Joke Board
Q. What is the best day to go to the beach?
A. Sunday, of course!
Q. What bow can't be tied?
A. A rainbow!
Q. What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?
A. Every morning you'll rise and shine!
Q. What does a teddy bear put in his house?
A. Fur-niture!
Q.What season is it when you are on a trampoline?
A.Spring time.
Q. What happens to cows during an earthquake?
A. They give milk shakes!
Q. Why did the jelly wobble?
A. Because it saw the milk shake!
Q. What do you call a girl who is always in the bookies?
A. Betty!
Q. Where do cows go on holiday?
A. Moo York
Q. Where did the computer go to dance?
A. To a disc-o.
Q. What has one head, one foot and four legs?
A. A Bed
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. He was a chicken.
Q. What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
A. The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says "chew chew chew".
Q. Why did the birdie go to the hospital?
A. To get a tweetment.
Q. Why was the guy looking for the food on his friend?
A. Because his friend said its on me.
Q. Did you hear the joke about the roof?
A. Never mind, it's over your head!
Q. What do you call a cow eating grass in a paddock?
A. A lawn mooer
Q. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A. Because he had no-body to go with.
Q. What has four legs but can't walk?
A. A table!
Q. Why did the turtle cross the road?
A. To get to the Shell station!
Q. What did the ground say to the earthquake?
A. You crack me up!
Q. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
A. Milk and quackers!
Q. Why did the elephant eat the candle?
A. He wanted a light snack!
Q. Why is the letter "G" scary?
A. It turns a host into a ghost
Q. What has 4 eyes but no face?
A. Mississippi!
Q. What did the spider do on the computer?
A. Made a website!
Q. What letters are not in the alphabet?
A. The ones in the mail, of course!
Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7?
A. Because 789!
Q. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
A. Because it felt crummy.
Q. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A. Because you never see rabbits wearing glasses!
Q. What do you call a pony with a sore throat?
A. A little horse
Q. What do you call cheese that is not yours?
A. Nacho Cheese
Q. Why did the sheep say "moo"?
A. It was learning a new language!
Q. What streets do ghosts haunt?
A. Dead ends!
Q. What is an astronaut's favorite place on a computer?
A. The Space bar!
Q. What exam do young witches have to pass?
A. A spell-ing test!
Q. Why did the boy eat his homework?
A. Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
Q. Why is Basketball such a messy sport?
A. Because you dribble on the floor!
Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A. He wanted cold hard cash!
Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
A. "Is that you mommy?"
Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.
Q. How do crazy people go through the forest?
A. They take the psycho path.
Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?
A. Cell phones.
Q. What do you get from a pampered cow?
A. Spoiled milk.
Q. Where do polar bears vote?
A. The North Poll
Q. What did Geronimo say when he jumped out of the airplane?
A. ME!!!
Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?
A. In snow banks.
Q. What's brown and sticky?
A. A stick.
Q. Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
A. Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!
Q. What dog keeps the best time?
A. A watch dog.
Q. Why did the tomato turn red?
A. It saw the salad dressing!
Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
A. It let out a little wine!
Q. How do you make a tissue dance?
A. Put a little boogey in it!
Q. Where do bees go to the bathroom?
A. At the BP station!
Q. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?
A. Odor in the court.
Q. What did the water say to the boat?
A. Nothing, it just waved.
Q. What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
A. Dam!
Takes me back to my school days.
Thanks.
Bob
Re:Q. What is the best day to go to the beach?
A. Sunday, of course!
buk, buk, buk,
Don't mind if I re-do Post #3 that I just Board Posted as here 3:27 am Sunday Mornin' goofed abit on html..
...no..'Tis Sunday mornin'... *smile
they are funny. hahaha
Knock Knock
ho's there?
Al!
Al who?
Al give you a kiss if you open this door!
...so it would seem that.... Hay! BlBobby got KISSED!
Grace mmm
..Yes, Yes, nice to meet you too. Good Day!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Aardvark!
Aardvark who?
Aardvark a hundred miles for one of your smiles!
same here...i remember using some of those when i was little. lol.